Bad, because he's clearly trying to say, "Have you got a pass?! What if I find one?! Which platform are you from?!"
Ultimately, I managed to pull out his tail, and at the end of the video with the cat he can be seen with no feather stumps in his butt.
Stumps were pulled out following the vet's advice after analysing the situation. The magpie moults very slowly, but he absolutely must have a new tail for the upcoming Autumn, so he doesn't get caught by something like a wild hawk. The tail is what makes a magpie so nimble and manoeuvrable.
Now, after a couple of months, new feathers will grow. We waited for the start of moulting time to remove the old ones. That's the best time, with the lowest risk of causing complications.
If a feather is removed incorrectly, this can cause damage to the region of growth, and the new feather will either never grow or be deformed.
Now Uk is holding a grudge against me and only wants to be friends with my jar of worms and my pocket full of nuts.